Less than a month before the start of the 2012 season, Les Miles announced that Heisman-candidate defensive back and star return man Tyrann Mathieu had been dismissed from LSU’s team for the year.  The wording left folks on the Bayou — and in the press — wondering about the definition of the word “dismissed” is in Cajun.

After zipping through LSU’s drug policy, it quickly became clear that a dismissal is a one-year deal, not a “forever” deal, in Baton Rouge.  So Mathieu theoretically could return to Miles’ team for the 2013 season.  But would he?  After all, he could do what many troubled stars have done in the past and go to an FCS school, play one season, and then jump straight to the NFL.

Ah, but then we learned that Mathieu and his family had decided that the player known as the Honey Badger would instead head to Houston and John Lucas’ drug rehabilitation clinic (proving that the young man and his family have his best interests — and not just their bank accounts — at heart).  Mathieu then returned to Baton Rouge in time to enroll as a regular ol’, pay-your-own way student for the fall semester.

With that, it was assumed by most that Mathieu would indeed be back on LSU’s team next fall if he avoided any more positive drug tests.  Yesterday on ESPN Radio, Les Miles hinted further that Mathieu could/will be back with his Tigers this time next year:

“There is a very legitimate chance this will have a happy ending.  I think the point of degree, and the point of handling your business and making sure everything is right and correct, and getting your feet on the ground — I think that is a tremendously happy ending.”

Don’t know about you, but that sounds like Mathieu will be welcomed back provided he takes care of his off-field situation.

Then again, with Miles’ it’s rare that you’re ever going get a simple “yes” or “no” answer.  I can’t be the only one who’s reminded of Damon Wayans’ “Oswald Bates” character from “In Living Color” when Miles speaks, can I?

(And, yes, the headline was by design.)

Bye-bye, moustache.  LSU quarterback Zach Mettenberger has shaved his facial hair in an attempt to change the luck for his sometimes struggling offense:

“The moustache was a great look for me, but unfortunately we didn’t play too hot the first five games.  I’m hoping to bring a different vibe to the offense and some good luck.”

What the Tigers really need are less stumbles and bumbles when they have the football, not less facial hair.

LSU is currently ranked 11th in the SEC in fumbles lost with six, but they’ve put the ball on the ground an additional five times for a grand total of 11 fumbles through five games.  Two fumbles per contest?  That’s way too many.

The Tigers are also seventh in the conference in sacks allowed having given up 11 total.  Les Miles says Mettenberger is working on getting rid of the ball faster.  “My game is definitely not running around laterally in the pocket,” the quarterback told The Baton Rouge Advocate.  “I’m a north-south type of guy, but this year, I’ve have to try to create plays.  Out of frustration I guess I do it too much.  I need to stick to the gameplan and my abilities.”

LSU is 13th — out of 14 SEC schools — in terms of penalty-yards-per-game.  The Tigers have been flagged 42 times for 305 yards… an average of 61.0 yards per game lost.

Yes, the Tigers are still 5-0 and ranked #4 in the nation.  But if they don’t begin to clean up their mix-ups on offense, that undefeated record might not last too long.

Playing well, the Tigers will be hard for anyone to beat.  Which is why they can’t afford to beat themselves.

If you were near the LSU practice fields yesterday, you might have heard a little something like this blaring from the facility’s speakers:

That’s because Les Miles — like a lot of other coaches — likes to use loud music to prepare his team for noisy road games:

“I think road games are an extension of the personality of the team.  If there’s a strong personality, those teams that are very, very good teams play well on the road.  It’s just how they are…

We put some noise out there (on the practice field).  We normally use a selection of music for a couple of periods, but when on the road, we use it for the majority of practice.”

The Baton Rouge Advocate reports that ZZ Top popped up on yesterday’s playlist.  Having seen Auburn’s struggles this year, we don’t think the Tigers in purple and gold should have too much trouble with the Tigers in navy and burnt orange.  Unless Miles had his guys listening to this God-awful mess:

I’m not sure a team could overcome that.

When two running backs both have big nights, they’ve gotta be given a nickname, right?  I mean that’s College Football 101.  Especially when one is 5-11, 240 pounds and the other is 6-2, 215 pounds.

Well, Les Miles was asked about the 6-2 Alfred Blue (16 carries for 123 yards) and the 5-11 Kenny Hilliard (13 carries for 141 yards and two TDs) and any potential nicknames for them after their bang-bang season opener against North Texas on Saturday.

Apparently Miles is a Will Ferrell fan:

With fall camp opening, Les Miles had a chat with the media yesterday and opened up about a couple of topics.  The coach summed up the unique situation his team is in as he enters his eighth season on the Bayou:

“The great news is that this is a team that has tremendously achieved and is very, very talented, but they didn’t get it done (last year).  It’s a team that had the best record in college football and, yet, they didn’t get it done. It’s an interesting position to be in…

(High preseason rankings are) a compliment to the body of work that’s gone on here.  Nobody in this room feels like there’s anything guaranteed anybody.  It’s only earned last. 

There’s a necessity to learn from your past experiences.  The good news is it was last year.”

While most publications have LSU ranked in the top three of their national polls, the coach made it clear there’s still plenty of opportunity for freshmen to step in and play.  “If this freshman class isn’t ambitious about where they play, how miserable,” he said.  “If they come in just thinking they’re redshirting, what a miserable way that would be to approach a great year because we need everybody.  This freshman class has to step into their role and play aggressively.”

If they do — and if the team avoids a hangover from last season’s BCS title game loss — it’s hard to imagine LSU not finishing near the top of the BCS rankings come December.

1. Georgia coach Mark Richt said the Bulldogs are interested in Penn State’s players.

2. Georgia AD Greg McGarity hopes lessons are learned from the Penn State story.

3. Some schools have already begun aggressively pursuing some of Penn State’s players.

4. One SEC school started its pursuit Monday morning, according to ESPN’s Mark Schlabach.

5. If a school wants to land Penn State running back Silas Redd, it will likely have to battle Southern Cal.

6. Ole Miss tight end Jamal Mosley has been suspended after another arrest.

7. Here’s a sneak peek of Mississippi State’s new football uniforms.

8. Will Mississippi State pursue Penn State players? Here’s an early look.

9. Michigan – Alabama’s opening opponent – has suspended its starting running back.

10. Will Auburn see Clemson’s star wide receiver Sammy Watkins in the opener?

11. Here’s a podcast with SEC coaches Gene Chizik, Gary Pinkel and Kevin Sumlin.

12. Tennessee coach Derek Dooley knows why people speculate about his job.

13. LSU coach Les Miles is showing confidence in quarterback Zach Mettenberger.

14. South Carolina basketball forward Carlton Geathers will have right knee surgery.

15. Florida coach Will Muschamp will go through the “Car Wash” at ESPN on Tuesday.

16. Some Penn State players will decide to leave. Here are some possibilities.

Finally, the end of a long, long day of listening to jibber-jabber.  It’s really sort of funny when you think about it.  All this stuff could be shared on a conference call.  So SEC Media Days is really just a three-day promotional push for the league.  And every year it just gets bigger and bigger.  It’s brilliant on the SEC’s part — right down to handing out press credentials like candy — but it’s totally unnecessary.

All that said, Les Miles is on the clock next and we’ll see just how many “Milesisms” he shares as he has to talk about an SEC Championship season… that actually left a bad taste in Tiger fans’ mouths.

* First note… Miles is late.  He’s always late.  Every year.  The SEC really, really needs to keep things on the clock.  Everybody gets X amount of time with coaches and players.  Period.  End of the day.  Note to the league — fix that.

* Miles opened with a talk about how he spent his summer.  Watching baseball, Olympic swimming trials, etc.  Really.

* The coach is talking up the league, his school.  Same as every other coach.  (Come to think of it, no one would waste time on a conference call asking about such things.)

* Finally to football, he says quarterback Zach Mettenberger has talent and he’s already taking a leadership role.

* Expects less quarterback runs and more deep throws from his offense this year.

* Miles says he wants to see two running backs move to the forefront of his rotation.

* The coach says he’s watched the BCS Championship Game a couple of times.  “There weren’t that many plays for our offense” so it didn’t take much time to watch.

* Asked what happened in the BCS title game, he said “We played our 14th game and we didn’t play as well in the first 13.”  He moved forward and said there were lessons learned and things that can be approved of.

* “No game is won on a Twitter page, it’s a nice pleasant pastime, very much like Media Days,” Miles said when asked about Tyrann Mathieu’s proclivity to tweet boastful statements.

* We’re having some technical issues, so I’m going to end this live blog early.  My apologies.

Our overall grade for Miles’ “performance” based on comfort, friendliness, openness… we’ll give him a 5.  And I realize I’m being much easier this year in these grades.  But Miles dealt with the questions asked of him.  He danced around one — whether he called Mark Richt for his opinion before inking Zach Mettenberger — but everything else was pretty straight-forward.  Typical Miles.

With SEC Media Days kicking off tomorrow in Hoover, Alabama, we thought we’d give you a brief primer of what to expect by way of 10 questions surrounding this year’s event.

And those questions are:

1.  How will Steve Spurrier steal the spotlight?

Two years ago, Spurrier was quiet, appearing almost meloncholy during his main appearance at Media Days.  The Gamecocks were coming off a so-so season that ended with a disappointing loss to UConn in a Birmingham bowl game.  When the coach is losing, he’s quiet.

Ah, but when he’s winning.

Last summer Spurrier was practically giddy during Media Days.  From nixing some of the SEC commissioner’s high-minded ideas to pushing his own “let’s pay the players out of our pocket” idea, Spurrier stole the show.

This spring at the SEC Meetings, the ‘Ol Ball Coach trotted out the idea — quickly shot down by everyone else including Les Miles who had at first backed it — of not counting cross-division games in the standings.  So what will that be his big splash at Media Days?  Will he take shots at Georgia or another SEC program?  Will he suggest only USC’s wins be counted in the standings, not its losses?  Or will he say something else just to stir the pot?  Because with Spurrier feeling good about his team, it’s likely the pot will indeed be stirred in some form or fashion.  (Not that that’s a bad thing.)

2.  How many “Milesisms” will Les Miles unleash in Hoover?

Take a coach who makes so many bizarrely-worded statements that someone launched a website featuring 632 of them.  Now throw in a thousand media types with cameras and microphones and cell phones for tweeting.  Finally, add in the fact that said coach just led his team to the most empty SEC Championship ever — thanks to a loss to SEC West rival Alabama in the BCS title game — and you’re guaranteed to get one or two “Milesisms.”

As he tries to guarantee his team won’t have a hangover from January’s loss, we can only hope for a jewel or two like this:

“I think it’s not that we have to do it differently, but that you have to do it with great approach.”

Uh, yeah.

Also watch for the coach to use the word “want” — as in: “We have a real want to run the football” — on multiple occasions.

3.  Which question will Mike Slive hear most often: “Will the SEC expand?” or “Who’ll make up the new playoff’s selection committee?”

Last year the commissioner’s state of the conference speech was his “agenda for change” in college football.  His main points: provide better benefits to student-athletes, strengthen academic requirements, modernize recruiting rules, and support the NCAA’s enforcement staff.  To date, paying players a stipend is still on the table, academic requirements have gotten tougher, and the NCAA just implemented looser recruiting rules for basketball.  The SEC has also surprisingly added two schools since last July and a college playoff is now suddenly on the horizon.

Regardless of what points Slive makes during this year’s speech, expect SEC expansion and playoff questions to be tossed to the commish again and again.  Followed closely by “What’s the Champions Bowl” actually going to be?

As for our question, here’s guessing Slive is most often asked about the new playoff and how the SEC can get multiple teams into it.

4.  How many times will Slive say: “The First Amendment is alive and well?”

This is the commissioner’s go-to quote when asked about any debate he doesn’t really want to weigh in on.  The over/under is one use of that statement per interview or speech.

5.  Who is more likely to bore the media throng to sleep: Gene Chizik or Dan Mullen?

Chizik has won a BCS crown for Auburn.  Mullen has excited the Mississippi State fanbase.  But when Mullen’s not throwing barbs at Ole Miss, he’s bo-ring to listen to.  (Not an insult, he’s paid to win games, not talk.)  And Chizik?  I’ve walked by store mannequins I’ve found more entertaining.

So who’ll win this year’s Bore-Off between the two SEC West rivals?  We’ll go with Chizik.  Because as noted above, Mullen is at least likely to gig the folks in Oxford a bit.

6.  How much of the throng will actually be media and how much will be fans?

There once was a day when Media Days was actually a media event.  Now it’s become a fan event with hundreds of people wandering the lobby of The Wynfrey Hotel hoping for an autograph.  More important, the SEC has chosen to give access to team-specific bloggers in recent years… and we’re not talking about Rivals.com or Scout.com sites.  We’re talking about Joe Fan’s “ILoveTheDawgs.com.”

There’s nothing wrong with fan sites or with blogs (how could we say that there is?).  But letting just any ol’ writer get a press pass has led to more coaches having to answer questions such as this: “If our offensive line doesn’t come together quick, can we beat Florida in September?”

Ugh.

7.  How will Alabama — the team and its players — do in the preseason “media” voting?

No fanbase has more “media” in the house than Alabama.  Look at the photos coming out of Hoover this week and you’re likely to see people actually sporting their favorite school’s color.  Most that do will be wearing crimson.

That fact has led recent preseason SEC Media Days polls to put Bama at or near the top of the SEC West every year with a truckload of representatives on the preseason All-SEC team, too.  Unless the SEC changes its policy this week, expect the “media” from sites like “TheTideRules.com” to swing the preseason votes heavily in Alabama’s favor once again.  Sure, Bama’s good, but LSU’s not bad, either.

Last season, several independent, objective media members chose not to vote in the league’s preseason poll at all.  Why bother?  If that happens again, expect an All-Alabama team come Thursday afternoon.

8.  Which coach is making his final SEC Media Days: Derek Dooley, Joker Phillips, John L. Smith or some surprise candidate?

Odds are strong that someone will be making his final appearance in Hoover this week.  Last year, Houston Nutt and Bobby Petrino stepped to the podium for a final time, though no on would have suspected Petrino’s quick exit.

So who’ll walk the last mile this year?

We’ll list the favorite as John L. Smith simply because he’s got the word “interim” right there in his job title.  The last interim coach in the SEC was Robbie Caldwell at Vanderbilt.  He didn’t fare too well on the job, but his down-home, folksy delivery –  a mix of Lewis Grizzard and Jerry Clower — was the hit of Media Days.  If Smith can entertain as Caldwell did, he may at least be remembered fondly come next year’s event… even if he’s not back in attendance.

9.  Will Hugh Freeze, Gary Pinkel and Kevin Sumlin bore or entertain?

Last year, the main address from Vandy’s James Franklin served as his coming out party.  It was obvious from the first words out of his mouth that Franklin wasn’t going to be wowed by the media in attendance, spooked by the SEC in general, or afraid to promise big changes at Vandy.

This year, we’ll learn if Freeze, Pinkel and Sumlin can stand the heat of all those television lights.  You can bet that none of them have seen anything in the past that will rival what they’re going to see media-wise this week.

Freeze will have to explain what makes him the guy to finally turn Ole Miss around for the long haul.  Pinkel and Sumlin will be asked ad nauseum whether or not their teams are ready for SEC competition and how they plan to adjust to it.

Here’s hoping these guys — at least in terms of personality — are more Caldwell than Chizik.

10.  What can you expect from MrSEC.com during SEC Media Days?

Imagine Twitter on steroids.  Rather than get caught in one room listening to a borefest while someone else is saying something witty or controversial in another room, we’ll be in our command bunker just as we have been for the past three Media Days.

Multiple laptops open, DVR running, cell phones for texts and calls.

What it means for you is that you can get live running blogs during the coaches’ main speeches.  You’ll get the stand-out quotes from coaches and players as they happen.  You’ll get immediate opinion on who’s looking nervous, who’s comfortable, who’s tiring of repetitive questions, etc.  We’ll also bring you any breaking news from Hoover or any of the SEC’s 14 campuses this week.  It always seems that someone has a player arrested or some scandal come to light during Media Days.

Yep, you’ll get all of that.  Up to the minute.  But it won’t be limited to 140 characters as Twitter’s tweets are.  (Though you can follow all of our news and notes via our own official Twitter and Facebook pages.)

Hope you’ll join us.

1.  The Football Bowl Association offered their congratulations to the folks who decided a playoff should include the bowls.

2.  This media member likes the new playoff set-up…

3.  But there are still plenty of unknowns according to this scribe.

4.  And a four-team playoff won’t last long in this writer’s mind.

5.  This writer thinks Auburn’s 2004 snub set the wheels in motion for a playoff.  (Not buying that.  Auburn and other schools have been shafted since.  This one was all about an all-SEC title game.)

6.  Need an early preview of Alabama’s opener with Michigan?  Here ya go.

7.  Nick Saban, Gene Chizik and Les Miles will take part in SEC BeachFest — along with an expected crowd of 10,000 — to kick off the season in late-August.  (Sorry, we’re not going to buy the “Coaches Gone Wild” videos that are sure to emerge.)

8.  The Arkansas state trooper who helped Bobby Petrino after his motorcycle wreck might have broken the law in accepting tickets and a Sugar Bowl ring from the UA program (pre-wreck).

9.  Ex-LSU center Justin Hamilton says he’ll find his way onto an NBA roster one way or another.

10.  Are you following Les Miles on Twitter?  (For that matter, you need to follow us on Twitter and you can do so right here.)

11.  Mississippi State’s Arnett Moultrie will probably be a first-round NBA draft pick… Renardo Sidney will not.

12.  Both State’s Dan Mullen and Ole Miss’ Hugh Freeze are okey-dokey with a playoff system.

13.  Ole Miss has created an “external relations unit.”

14.  Texas A&M has suspended two key contributors on defense for its season opener due to the dreaded violation of team rules.

15.  A rendering of possible renovations for Kyle Field sent Aggie fans into a frenzy yesterday.  (Looks cool, folks.)

16.  A&M linebacker Sean Porter makes the Top 20 of this paper’s “best players in the SEC” list.

17.  Kevin Sumlin talks about his squad’s SEC transition.

18.  Florida will have to face a lot of quality quarterbacks in 2012.

19.  Gator hoops assistant Matt McCall is getting a raise, while Billy Donovan says his team is trying to get an identity.

20.  Georgia’s going to have to start thinking about strength of schedule.

21.  Defensive coordinator Todd Grantham — naturally — hopes to a be a head coach someday.

22.  An NCAA rule change is a great help to UGA hoops coach Mark Fox.

23.  This writer ranks the importance of Kentucky’s 2012 football games.

24.  Breaking down the physics of ex-Cat Anthony Davis’ shot-blocking technique.

25.  Trademarking terms tied to his “unibrow.”  (Yes, really.)

26.  Missouri AD Mike Alden on the school’s $200 million facilities upgrade plan: “I think when (the SEC sees) this amount of work coming out of the chute, it will tell them Mizzou is really serious.”

27.  The Tigers have unveiled an artist’s rendering of their own proposed football stadium upgrades.

28.  The SEC has been at the forefront of the college football playoff debate for a while now.

29.  “Newness” abounds in SEC hoops circles.

UPDATE — A terrifically-researched piece from SI.com’s Stewart Mandel, this column is an absolute must-read.  Great stuff.

One quick vent:  It never fails.  If I have outside business to attend to, that will be the day when news stories pop up from one end of the SEC to the other.  Always.  Guaranteed.  It’s amazing really.  Folks who haven’t said a peep in weeks all decided to write and report on June 27th of all days.  Grrrrrrrrr.  At any rate, sorry for all the links today.  I’ve got opinions on a lot of what you see above, but no time to write ‘em.

CBSSports.com’s Dennis Dodd has unveiled his annual rundown of hot seat rankings for college football coaches today.  According to one of his colleagues, Dodd’s ratings should be a wake-up call for those coaches scoring poorly.

Brett McMurphy — also of CBSSports.com — 75% of those coaches given a grade of four or higher (on a five-point scale) over the last four years did… not… return the following season.

So how does Dodd view the temperature of 14 Southeastern Conference captains’ chairs?   See below:

Nick Saban, Alabama — 0.0 (Can’t be touched)

John L. Smith, Arkansas — 5.0 (Hot seat!  Win or be fired)

Gene Chizik, Auburn — 2.0 (Safe, but you never know)

Will Muschamp, Florida — 2.5 (Safe, but you never know)

Mark Richt, Georgia — 2.5 (Safe, but you never know)

Joker Phillips, Kentucky — 3.5 (On the bubble, feeling pressure)

Les Miles, LSU — 2.0 (Safe, but you never know)

Dan Mullen, Mississippi State — 1.5 (Very safe, change unlikely)

Gary Pinkel, Missouri — 0.5 (Can’t be touched)

Hugh Freeze, Ole Miss — 0.5 (Can’t be touched)

Steve Spurrier, South Carolina — 0.5 (Can’t be touched)

Derek Dooley, Tennessee — 5.0 (Hot seat!  Win or be fired)

Kevin Sumlin, Texas A&M — 2.0 (Safe, but you never know)

James Franklin, Vanderbilt — 1.0 (Very safe, change unlikely)

Now, this is one man’s opinion so we could all quibble with a point or two.  I wonder how/why Phillips’ is believed to be that much safer than Dooley and Smith, for example.  (Here’s guessing a lot of Kentucky fans are wondering the same.)

But one thing I will point out is that anything is possible in the rough-and-tumble SEC.  As Arkansas entered it’s first season of SEC play back in 1992, then-AD Frank Broyles fired then-head coach Jack Crowe after a season-opening loss to The Citadel.  One game.

We tend to overreact in these parts and for that reason — while I respect the time Dodd has put into giving all FBS coaches a numeric hot-seat-rating — I still realize that if things go badly enough, anyone in the SEC can go from the cool zone to the frying pan in a nanosecond.

Find an LSU messageboard and read the posts before the BCS Championship Game — when the Tigers were still 13-0 — and after their 21-0 loss to Alabama.  The Tigers’ Miles can tell you how things work in the Deep South.